The other day, someone asked me how they could be more culturally sensitive. I really appreciated the question because most people don’t even stop to think about cultural sensitivity.

This person (from a white background) told me they feel overwhelmed by the conflict they see between black and white people. They also said, “You seem to navigate both of these different worlds as a native.”

Hmmm….

Are We Really That Different?

There’s this idea that black and white cultures exist in two completely separate worlds—but is that really true?

✅ Yes, because culture and history shape our perspectives. The way we grow up, the norms we absorb, and the narratives we inherit all influence how we experience race and identity.

❌ But also no, because human emotions—love, fear, ambition, the need for belonging—are universal.

As someone who is mixed-race, I see this from both sides. I share just as much with my white heritage as I do with my black heritage. So, when people try to place me firmly in one camp or the other, I always find myself wondering: why do we insist on dividing things into such absolute terms?

If we want to be more culturally sensitive, maybe we need to shift away from “us vs. them” thinking and focus more on what connects us.

The Power of Listening

One of the biggest ways to bridge cultural gaps is through real listening. And no, that doesn’t mean bombarding people with questions to “figure them out.”

• Listening is not interrogation. You don’t have to ask a hundred questions to prove you’re interested—just being present can be enough.
• Listening is about intention. Are you listening to understand, or just waiting for your turn to speak?
• Listening helps us challenge assumptions. We often think we know what someone’s experience is, but real understanding comes from hearing their story—not filling in the blanks ourselves.

And let’s be honest—shifting our assumptions can be uncomfortable. But that’s exactly what cultural sensitivity requires.

Why This Feels Hard for Some People

• Because we are wired to categorize. Our brains love patterns—it’s how we process the world.
• Because we fear being wrong. Many people avoid cultural conversations altogether because they’re afraid of saying the wrong thing.
• Because we center ourselves. When someone shares their experience, we instinctively relate it to our own—sometimes without really hearing them out.

I remember having a few frustrating conversations with a Black British Nigerian. Every time we spoke about racism, he would tell me how I should see things, dismissing my own perspectives. He assumed that because we shared certain cultural ties, my experiences and interpretations should align with his.

But they don’t, at least not always.

And that’s where things often break down—we assume that our personal experience is THE experience.

Cultural sensitivity isn’t just about understanding different racial or cultural groups. It’s also about recognising that within those groups, no two experiences are identical.

We all see the world through our own lens. But if we’re serious about cultural awareness, we need to step outside of that lens from time to time.

So, what’s the alternative?

• Staying open.
• Getting comfortable with discomfort.
• Reminding ourselves that cultural sensitivity isn’t about being perfect—it’s about being aware. It’s not a one-time project but a lifelong journey.

It’s about stepping back from our own perspective long enough to recognize that someone else’s reality might be different—yet still valid—even if we don’t immediately relate to it.